Doing things by yourself

In this day and age I feel like there is a stigma attached to doing things by yourself, going out for dinner by yourself draws up the assumption of being stood up and going to the cinema to see a film by yourself is considered odd. It just seems to paint a picture that an individual is lonely or without friends. In reality it is quite the opposite people don't look at you and give you sympathy looks, waiters don't question someone eating by themselves etc. 

"I have no one to go with... no one wants to come with me... everyone is busy..."

I have overheard the following sentences and even been guilty of saying them myself but there is something so liberating about going out and doing things by yourself. Yes, it is sometimes nice to have company but I have always been a firm believer that if you really want to do something then you should not stop yourself from doing it just because no one will come with you. 

Even though I am a shy person and can really struggle with social interaction, I have always considered myself to be an independent person and having to do something by myself never bothered me. Growing up a lot of my friends had no interest in doing the things I was interested in for example going to gigs. My thought at the time was why should I miss out on seeing a band I like/love just because no one would come with me, I actually went to so many gigs by myself when I was younger. I remember queuing up outside Rock City when I was 15 years old waiting to go see The Kooks, this to me was also my first 'real' official gig (because it wasn't blue, steps or Gareth Gates) I was slightly apprehensive at first, worried people might notice I was there by myself but I also realised I wasn't the only person who had come alone, and to be honest once you are inside everyone is crammed together that no one even notices not that they cared in the first place. The gig itself was such an amazing experience which I would have missed out on if I didn't go alone. 

Doing things by yourself may come easier to some than others, I can understand that there are those who may suffer from social anxiety. However, if you are one of those people who uses the above sentences I challenge you go to do something by yourself. 

Below I have compiled a list of things I like to do by myself. 

- Go shopping, okay this is an easy one and I assume most people are comfortable going shopping alone but if you aren't this may be a perfect way to ease yourself into trying something solo.
- Have something to eat or drink, I can recall the first time I went somewhere to eat by myself and I just wanted to rush eating my food because I genuinely thought people was staring, it was silly really, I've seen plenty of people enjoying food alone and never gave it a second thought.
- Going somewhere new or getting a new hobby, you should really be doing this for yourself because life is too short not to explore or try new things! 

On top of that a lot of people might eventually enjoy doing things by themselves, you can go at your own pace, there is no need to make small talk, you can have time to reflect on life. 

Let me know what are your thoughts on doing things solo, is this something you do already or something you want to work on?

  1. I can do things for myself like shopping and eating doesn't bother me but going to the cinemas or a gig I've always wanted to go on my own but cared too much about what people would think and another thing is going to the gym I feel people would stare at me like 'does she even know what's she doing'

    Leanne |

    1. You should go for it if you can, what I find really odd is that when I have been to a gig or to the gym with friends or my sister, at a gig we end up loosing each other so end up alone anyway then at the gym I always go off and do my own thing. Yet people often 'freeze' up about doing these things solo. I am yet to go to the cinema by myself though.

  2. Totally agree with this Hannah. I love taking an afternoon off work and going to a tea room by myself. I take my Kindle and take my sweet time, it's bliss. Your comment about trying new things is spot on too - there's so much to try and you never know what you might love!

  3. I've learned that being able to enjoy your own company is literally a sign that you value yourself and that your comfortable with who you are.

  4. I love exploring by myself...when I take a wrong turn, there is no one to judge ��
    ♡ Dynamic Bohemian

  5. I am perfectly fine with going solo, be it to the shop, or to the cinema, or to the restaurant. But I am generally an introvert, so I am perfectly ok to go solo. :)

  6. I need to start doing things by myself, I am always including people. Might just have to try this now. Thanks

  7. In the beginning I thought going solo was sad, but once I started travelling alone I found out my own company is so much better than certain companies, and I felt happier and by no means sad or weird ed out.

  8. I love doing things alone! I agree most people these days don't, though. It's the spotlight effect. You think the spotlight is on you and everyone is watching when most people are too busy thinking that everyone is thinking about them. I think movies alone is a great start for someone who wants to be more independent since it's dark and no one will see you, and then eating alone is a great second step. I have now gone as far to go concerts by myself and ended up making friends there!

  9. Their's nothing wrong in going solo. Those who walks alone walks the fastest and great minds always thinks alone.

  10. I like doing shopping alone because there is no one telling me, "did you finish?"or " i am tired/bored". But there are moments when i like to go shopping together with a friend. I don't feel comfortable going eating alone. But in general i like doing things alone.

  11. I find it funny how many people don't like doing anything by themselves, they're always worrying about having others, while there are things that we can do alone and enjoy it just as much. I like having lunch by myself, it's only of the few moments of my day that I can opt to not have anyone around. I think I've never went out to dinner by myself, maybe I should try it someday. It should be fun to get dressed and go to a nice place, right?

    I agree with you, we shouldn't wait for others, we should go and do what we want, and if they want to join us, great, but if now, it's fine too. I like myself, my own company.

  12. Sometimes it is really pleasant to enjoy doing things by yourself. It gives me confidence

  13. I love people but I also really appreciate quality time by myself. I only ever go shopping on my own and I like going to spas by myself too - it's time where I can literally think about me and my needs.

    Rosie |

  14. I really like this post. Shopping doesn't really bother me. Eating I think we all have a stigma with because of society, but I actually like eating's quiet haha

    Going to events, I prefer going with people.

    It's all a process of learning to be comfortable.

  15. Really positive and inspiring post, I enjoyed reading it very much! I think shopping alone is a great step to doing something alone. My own tip if you want to grab a drink or cake etc. is to buy it to go and sit outside if it’s sunny and watch the world go by. I wish I had the courage to go somewhere like a gig alone, go you! It’s fun to do things independently, and often when I’m out I see people I know or get chatting to new people. Lovely blog too!! :-) xx

    Helen | Helens Fashion & Beauty Blog

  16. I am perfectly fine with going solo, the first challenge is in August. I will be leaving for a year to Mexico!


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